The Wallace Column: Golf

Regular Horneteers will know that Wallace, The Guv’nor’s long-standing associate and friend, has an opinion or two on matters of style. In light of recent publishing scandals here in the UK, Bill Hornets would like to stress that the opinions of Wallace in no way represent the opinions of Bill Hornets, Hornets of Kensington or, indeed, of The Hornet blog. Unless, of course, he is saying venal things about beanie hats and “skinny” jeans, in which case Bill Hornets, Hornets of Kensington and The Hornet are bally well right behind him foursquare…


“Golf. A good walk spoiled barely even begins to cover it.


A popular argument in favour of the game is that it brings a lot of money into Scotland through golfing peripherals, such as knitwear.


Knitwear? Do these people realise how far up the northern hemisphere Scotland lies? Do they think that the bottom would fall out of the woolly jumpers game just because golf had been abolished? Of course not. It merely means that those pastel pink and yellow argyle pattern affairs so beloved of fading comedians and absentee movie star Nationalist activists would be consigned to the charity shop of history. No bad thing, if you ask me.”


More from Wallace soon. You have been warned.

Hornets Vintage the Online Shop


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